MarkP0rter's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Waterlollies]

Despite the name there was no LOL in this one

Seriously what was this? Was I the only one who was looking at his watch while watching this and wondering "when is this finally going to end?". I might sound VERY arrogant here but what was going on in this? Not much if you ask me.

Let's try to sum up the whole Waterlollies story in a TEXT to see how exciting it is in written form:
Bitey runs around and annoys some fly/water creatures. Then he escapes and steals some water drops (waterlollies?) from some creature which grow inside Bitey's stomach. Bitey runs away and hides in the bushes and sees other creatures he has annoyed in the past. After that he runs away again and hides in some cave where he gets kicked out (by creatures he has annoyed in the past?)- the fly/water creatures find him and he escapes again. after some more running he kicks out some creature out of a branch. Some other monster finds Bitey in his new hideout and pulls him out of it. Then he rams Bitey with his horn into the branch and the waterlollies start popping out- THE END

This is exactly what happened in the movie. While reading this summary didn't you think: BORING!

The whole story in a nutshell: Bitey runs away and hides a bunch of times.

This movie was just like any other Adam Philips movie (but the Hitchhiker): BORING!
Adam Phillips is an animator but he is certainly NO story teller. At least his stories don't manage to entertain me on their own.

Just imagine what this movie would be like if it wasn't animated that well. I think nobody would care.

The ending was just like the whole movie. There wasn't anything going on. I assume the ending was supposed to make me laugh but I had no feeling when I saw the ending. It also didn't feel like an ending to me. There was simply zero satisfaction. It's kind of sad to see how this movie leaved me emotionless. I wasn't laughing neither was I crying.

I think I've criticized Adam's writing skills enough. This movie is of course a GOOD ANIMATION but it's not a good MOVIE. I have seen the movie and I was amazed about how well animated it was but I will never ever watch it again because there is nothing in it that makes me come back again which is a shame in my opinion.
I really really wish the writing will be better his future projects.

Animationwise the movie was just outstanding- something we got used to by now after having seen Adam's other movies. I would even go so far and say this is the best animated flash movie I have ever seen. YET he manages to improve dramatically and make his latest movie even more impressive then the previous one. You will watch an Adam Philip's movie and you will say "WOW- those animations and drawings are impressive" then Adam releases a new project and you will find yourself saying "WOW- this is even BETTER than the previous one". He always manages to get better while you were already thinking you already got 100% of him- but no he will give you 120%. If you calculate all his movies together by now we should be at around 800%.
Adam Philips' movies showcase impressive animations combined with fitting music and great shadows and lighting and water effects that just make you go WOW simply because that used to be Adam's job back at Disney.
At a certain degree it's already ridiculous how much Adam is trying to get EVERYTHING out of Flash. In certain cases he is trying too hard. Flash animations are supposed to be little animated video files everybody can play because of the short file size but since he tries to get EVERYTHING out of Flash you need a REALLY fast computer too handle his movies which means most people CANT watch his flash animations and need to watch it as prerendered movie on youtube- what an irony.

So my suggestion for Adam: Keep up your animations- we all love them and you are doing a great job but please improve your writing skills. So far there isn't much going on in your movies but showcasing the Brackenwood Forest.

[Overtime - Jatkoaika]

A Brillant DEEP European Animation

You guys are geniuses. I just love this movie. The moment it started I thought to myself "This looks SO EUROPEAN". For some reason it just does. The whole thing feels very European which is a pretty cool thing. I just enjoyed this unique style I had never seen before. Not only the art style was unique but the way it was animated was also interesting. It was something new and different so it stands out of the crowd. Overall the animation and art style just fit PERFECTLY to the story. The story was VERY deep in my opinion so I enjoyed it. In fact the story offered a lot. It was deep, it was funny it was charming, it was cute, it was lovely, it was creepy, it was weird maybe even spooky or to put it in a simple way: just enjoyable to watch. It's also great to see if somebody tells a story just with PICTURES/animations and without any words. Many animations are just like animated dialogs/stories while this story ONLY works as an animation. It's not possible to write this story down with WORDS so this is also why it's a good animation.
I don't speak Finnish so I don't know what the credits at the end said. Was this made for some University project or something?
Anyways great work and keep it up : )

[Dawn of Sock]

Hardcore FBF animation with a lovely song

I don't really like short reviews- they always seems careless to me. This is why I don't write many reviews. I don't want to seem careless but yet I can't think of something to say. It's the same with this movie. It's just awesome and that's about it. You get some big thumbs up for the whole thing to be frame by frame. Animating this frame by frame must have been a pain in the ass but it was so worth your time. How long did it take to make and how long did you work on it every day? I really enjoyed it how the camera turned around in certain scenes. For example the scene where this pizza dude was hanging on the wall and then the camera moves to the cult members. That was beautiful. I enjoy such camera movements. So the animations were great. To give you some advice I think you could improve your characters a bit more but then it's your style and more advanced characters are even more work. I have to admit I was too stupid for the story. So he gets some hamster (which you call a sock for some reason) and that hamster turns out to be evil and does...stuff? I think the guy who bought the hamster was suddenly in hell which explains all those creatures. Yet it was odd and I was too stupid for it. I am not saying this is a bad thing but maybe you could have made things a little bit more clear for idiots like me. But then on the other hand it's good if you give people a movie they can think about and ask themselves "what was going on in there?". I guess I am just talking bullshit because I don't really know what to say so I better stfu
Anyways WHY isn't this movie front page yet?

[Newgrounds Joyride 2007]

Awesome- whats that song?

What can I say? This was just awesome and bloody entertaining. Tim is active on NG for sooooo many years now and you can totally see and tell how he improved. It’s really impressive. I loved that style a lot and the coloured outlines worked so god damn well. It was just enjoyable to watch. The whole movie was also pretty funny. It started with Pico running around full of joy. You would normally expect some shooting around and a lot of blood and I’m honestly sick of all those movies. In the end they are all the same so it’s great to see that this one was DIFFERENT. It was great to see all those Newgrounds characters and how Pico kicked their arse. Great job!

BY THE WAY Can ANYBODY tell me what song that was? I just can’t get it out of my head now. I think its either some old cartoon or a NES game but I just don’t know. HELP, please!

[Mr Coo #4]

An outstanding masterpiece

God lord! I don’t even know what to say. It was just awesome and beautiful. I can’t even understand why this one only got 36 reviews so far while other crap on the frontpage has got like 130 reviews (hello I’m not allowed to write stuff on deviant art OMG 130 reviews).
Your Flash is an outstanding masterpiece of pure beauty that deserves way more attention. Wonderful frame by frame animation, great shading, a great background, music that fit so damn perfectly. Everything was perfect about it. It kind of felt like watching a cartoon on drugs. I enjoined the flat and colourful background. With adding shadows behind your characters you added depth to that flat background. Bottom line: this movie is an outstanding piece on Newgrounds. It made me feel like “oh my god” the whole time while watching it.
Great work. Keep it up.

Do you show this movie at European film festivals?

[ouch that hurts]

Many laughs for a short flick

HAHA! I already read the review the guy before me wrote but still "let's touch penisses lol" made me spit out my whole sandwich. The whole movie was so bloody hilarious. You made good use of Flash’s blur filter and certainly have your own style that works. I have no freaking idea why you put Tom Selleck in it but it was funny as well like the whole movie. At some point it was a bit gross the girl also had your voice but then 1) who cares 2) you probably thought that would be funny as well so it didn’t really bother me that much. Good work. Keep it up :)

[Life with a Wolf]

Nice but nothing special

I have to admit this is done VERY well. The backgrounds are all drawn in Photoshop or some other graphic program. Some backgrounds look pretty good and are nice coloured while others look like stuff that was scribbled pretty quickly just to have some background. Overall the backgrounds are nice to look at and everybody can tell it took some effort. The same goes for the characters done in Flash. It’s a nice drawn movie and everybody can tell you are a skilled artist but there wasn’t much going on in the movie. The guy is living with a wolf which eats breakfast cereal. Then we get some animation of the cereals flying around (which looks pretty lousy) and some animation of the wolf shaking it’s head pretty fast. You have the knowledge that stuff will get blurred when it moves fast and use a technique very common in animations for fast movement yet you don’t manage to make it work well. It somehow just look wrongs to me. Probably you should have tried to add just a little bit of hints of the wolf’s “face” to that blur/motion stuff like a fast moving dot for it’s nose or something. After the moving was over (it was pretty short) I was wondering: Hm what did I just look at?
And that’s exactly the point. You are skilled but there isn’t much going on and a wolf eating breakfast and tossing it around isn’t funny at all. So the movie leaves me with a bitter taste in my mouth. A feeling of WHAT THE HELL… if you turn this into a full movie with a story and actual JOKES it might be good but so far it’s nothing and feels very incomplete. In fact you didn’t bother to add a preloader. So if you are going to turn this into a full movie I wish you good luck with it.

[Saint Patricks Bar]

In all those years you didn’t develop any tiny bit

animated like SHIT and not even funny
and terribly annoying.
you might think it gets funnier if he hits the snake for even more times.
it's some simple math that doesn’t work.

1 hit = one laugh
more hits = more laughs

it doesnt work and it’s crap like pretty much every joe cartoon cartoon. i'm honestly impressed you are still around after so many years of doing nothing but creating crap. i assume its because you are one of the very early flash animators. years ago there was only crap because people didnt know how to use flash (back in 1997) and there was your stuff so you got some fans. you are probably the first person who made violent cartoons in flash so thumbs up for being innovative but thumbs down for not having developed any tiny bit in all those years. you would expect somebody who has used flash for so many years now to have at least gained a bit more skill but it’s like you have never developed at all.

This cartoon is awful and doesn’t deserve Front Page at all but since you are the famous Joe Cartoon and were just smart to start Flash back in 1997 when nobody cared you are considered as big cheese.

At least you have an unique style but that’s about all you have.

[Bring a Condom on a Date?]

funny short

i liked the idea, i liked the animations, i liked the voice acting and it made me laugh (because its so true) so good job

[~PrintError~]

Thanks for uploading

Well I enjoyed it. I liked the animations. They were done fbf and the style was interesting. Yet I found the long pauses in between to be a bit disturbing. There were like some seconds when nothing happened at all and then he would do something again (look around- he could have already looked around before). The music was pretty creepy and sounded like “hello world this is my first experience with an audio program” and a bit like some old midi. Thinking about the end the creepy music fit well yet I’m sure you know yourself you can improve your music but uh whatever. I just started to make music for my cartoons as well and I rather use my first attempts and crap music than ripping some popular song :)